Content warning: This article contains mentions of suicide and mental health and may be distressing to some readers.
Bar Asraf, a 30-year-old resident of Sha’arei Tikva, died by suicide after shooting himself at the grave of his girlfriend, Liron Barda, who was murdered at the Nova festival during Hamas’s 2023 October 7 massacre.
Friends of Asraf told Walla that he had difficulty coping with the death of Barda.
"We were at my brother's wedding. He apparently started to feel lonely. You couldn't tell. He was always happy and laughing," his sister, Lihi, shared with Walla.
"His best friend was murdered in Nova. He has a tattoo of her, she was a part of his soul. At the groom's celebration, there was dancing and a Shabbat reception with a singer; it was magical. We were at the peak of the family's life."
“Yesterday he left, and I thought he went to be alone and think like he usually does,” his sister recounted.” An hour passed, then two hours passed, and my older sister said, 'Come on, we're going to look for him.’ First in the most logical places, and then we went to check Liron's grave. He loved talking there and being with her."
Lehi Asraf recalls finding her brother at Barda's grave
Lehi, who recalled the moment she found her brother, told Walla, "my sister had a feeling and told me, 'You go.' I walked over, and suddenly I saw him lying next to Liron’s grave. I said to him, 'Bar, get up, what are you doing again...' and then I realized he was covered in blood.”
“I stepped on a gun beside him. I screamed. I couldn't function. My father started CPR. I knew it was the end. He was cold. Magen David Adom tried everything. He died in the place he wanted to be most, with the woman he wanted to be with most,” she continued.
“He drove there on Shabbat, and he was a person who kept Shabbat," she said.
"He always told me, my joy, you are a fighter, everything. He was a good person, helped everyone. He bought food for those in need. He was so proud of me," she added. “He was actually coping well, but he had a moment of madness, being alone while seeing everyone with their families.”
“People need to know what Nova did to people,” Lehi emphasized. “On that day [October 7th], he started driving toward Re'im to save her, until he realized there was no one left to save and they turned him back halfway."
Barda worked as the bar manager at the Nova music festival in Re'im. Even though her friends and family begged her to flee, during the massacre she administered first aid to the wounded until she was murdered herself. The devastating news stayed with Asraf until his death.
Barda and Asraf described as 'soulmates since childhood'
"Bar was a special boy," his mother, Bracha, shared. "A boy of giving, of love. He gave his sister everything I couldn't give. He organized food for soldiers. There was nothing I asked for that he didn't give me.”
Bracha recalled Barda and Asraf’s relationship, describing them as “soulmates since childhood.”
“If he was feeling down, she would lift him up - she was his listening ear. Everything to him. Every problem he had, she was his confidante. When he was in Colombia, she surprised him and flew out to meet him there. A friendship you can't even describe,” she stated.
“There were three nerve-wracking days when we didn't know what happened to her at Nova. He stayed at my house and didn't leave my side from morning until evening, sitting with her entire family. He stayed in touch with them ever since, brought her mother bouquets of flowers, and got a tattoo of her."
His mother continued: "A little while ago, I saw him looking sad and asked what was wrong. He said, 'Mom, I'm sad. It's hard for me without Liron. I miss her. There's no one who can replace her, no one to cheer me up.' We felt he was struggling deeply without her. Last week, he went wild at a tavern event ahead of the wedding and dedicated a song to me and his father. We didn't see anything, not a single sign. It was his farewell party."
The Sha'ar Shomron Local Council shared its condolences with the Asraf family over the untimely death. "We send a warm hug to the dear family during this difficult time and wish to strengthen you in your great pain," the council stated.